Anti-Photogenic

I hate photogenic people.  They make me so mad.  Why,  you ask?  Jealousy.  I am straight up hulking it out, green with envy over here.  Which makes it really hard to type because my giant green hulk fingers don't fit on this tiny keyboard.  But that is not the point.  I don't actually think there is a point.  But if there is, that is not it.  You see, every day I stand in front of the mirror and attempt to make myself look less like Miley Cyrus' much poorer, less stylish, un-famous half-cousin.  It is a hard job let me tell you.  And I like to think that I succeed.  Just like the band LMFAO, I work out.  And I put make-up on... most of the time.  Ok yes, I don't really brush my hair on a daily basis but its curly!  It would look even worse if I did.  That might just be an excuse.  Oh well.  The fact of the matter is, even if I look at myself in the mirror and think, "Wow!  This is the best I have ever looked!" when I get a picture taken of me and see it later, I look like a sheepdog with really humanistic features.  There is always something.  Sometimes, you get me at an angle that makes my nose look 10 miles long.  Other times, my shirt falls weird and I look pregnant.  And no matter how much make-up I put on, I still look like a 15 year old.  You can never see it.  I look like I just woke up from a long nap.  And I am not talking about the way Hollywood portrays waking up from a nap.  You know, when your hair looks perfect and somehow your eyeliner isn't smeared down your face like you have been crying for eight hours.  No, I look like what people actually look like when they wake up from a nap.  So yes.  I hate photogenic people.  I am actually anti-photogenic people.  Because they ruin it for all the rest of us.  And then I end up being that person.  You know.  The one you look up on facebook to show your friends but then you can't find a single good picture of them so you start backpeddling like, "well they don't normally look like this." or "her hair isn't actually as large as the empire state building."  Yeah.  I know you know what I am talking about.  So I say, we ban all photogenic people from having their picture taken.  Are you with me?